Today has been a hard day. I have sinned against these precious little ones over and over again. I have been impatient, angry, loud, and inconsiderate of their feelings to the point that I have cried over the sound of my own voice. And even though she has been disobedient and he has been clingy and needy I have no excuse. I have crushed their spirits and damaged their hearts. They have had to hear the words "I'm sorry, please forgive me" to many time today. Thank goodness their little souls are so forgiving and loving. They love me the same even after such a trying day. So after they closed their eyes this afternoon. I went before my Father and begged forgiveness once again. Because it is He whom I have sinned against the most. And once again I'm so thankful for His forgivesness and that even though I am a woman of fallen nature, He has blessed me with the precious little souls.
How can I do this Lord? I want to be an example before them to guide them toward the Truth. Give me the grace I need to raise them up in love. I need you Lord.
Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.
This is my heart:
And ye shall teach them your children, speaking of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
How can I teach them unless I can live it before them??
They have tender, trusting hearts that are in need of direction. He has chosen me to be their guide. So I must fall on my face before Him each and everyday and pray for guidance. I must learn of Him so that I can be an example for them. I must be broken before all so that I might be holy in His sight. Though unworthy of this calling, this is who I am called to be.